Parenting Style – Part 2

Children's Health, Parenting
This is the second part in a series excerpted from my book God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. You can learn more about parenting in my books God's Design for the Highly Healthy Child or God's Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. A Parenting Style Case Study Imagine you’re putting clothes into your teen’s dresser. When you open the drawer, you see a pack of cigarettes. Here’s how parents of the four parenting styles might react: (more…)
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The ABCD’s of Parenting – Part 7

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Parenting
This is the seventh part in a series excerpted from my book God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. DISCIPLINE We now come to the fourth letter—D for “Discipline.” Lifting up our teens with affirmation, blameless love, and connectedness is critical for their health. But like a table, a fourth leg is needed to keep things on an equilibrium—the leg of parental guidance and enforced boundaries. (more…)
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The ABCD’s of Parenting – Part 6

Children's Health, Parenting
This is the sixth part in a series excerpted from my book God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. CONNECTING WITH THE WORKADAY WORLD If your teen is not overscheduled and you feel good about the family connectedness, then part-time work may be another way your teen can develop into a highly healthy adult. After all, he or she does need to learn how to work, and the last I checked, the best way to learn how to work is to work! (more…)
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The ABCD’s of Parenting – Part 5

Children's Health, Parenting
This is the fifth part in a series excerpted from my book God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. CONNECTING WITH FRIENDS ... AND MORE FRIENDS Besides connectedness with parents, highly healthy teens need connectedness with highly healthy friends, activities, and faith communities. As teens gain independence and go out on their own, friendships become more important than ever. (more…)
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The ABCD’s of Parenting – Part 4

Children's Health, Parenting
This is the fourth part in a series excerpted from my book God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. CONNECTEDNESS The “C” of the “ABCD’s” of raising highly healthy children and nurturing highly healthy teens is “Connectedness.” It includes connecting with your kids, connecting your kids with good friends, and connecting your kids with their Creator. (more…)
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The ABCD’s of Parenting – Part 3

Children's Health, Parenting
This is the third part in a series excerpted from my book God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen. BLAMELESS LOVE The "B" of the "ABCD’s" of raising highly healthy children and nurturing highly healthy teens is "Blameless” or “Unconditional Love." Do you love your child blamelessly, unconditionally? Or is your love conditional, as in “I love you because of ... ” or “I love you if ... ”? (more…)
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The ABCD’s of Parenting – Part 1

Children's Health, Parenting
In my book, God’s Design for the Highly Healthy Teen, I wrote about the fact that highly healthy teens need four things from their parents to maintain their emotional health during their preteen and adolescent years. I call them the ABCD’s of parenting: A = Affirmation B = Blameless love C = Connectedness D = Discipline (more…)
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Mentored by a Milker of Cows

Family Newsletter, Mental Health, Spiritual Health
Long-time readers know of my fondness and appreciation for Bill Judge, a retired dairyman in Kissimmee, Florida, who has been my mentor and coach since the mid-1980's. Now that my father has passed, Bill has become my second dad. In a 2010 blog, "Mentored by a Milker of Cows," I told you the story about Bill's loving mentoring of me. Now this story is being retold by Significant Living magazine: (more…)
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How to Create a Spoiled Brat: 9 Parenting No-Nos

Children's Health, Parenting
Kids need to know their parents love them. But some moms and dads think that the way to show love is to accept children's bad behavior. And that can turn even good kids into spoiled brats, says parenting guru Nancy Samalin, New York City-based author of "Loving without Spoiling" and other books on parenting. Here are Nancy's nine parenting no-nos from a report on CBS News: 1) Mistake: Always "Rescuing" Your Child Are you a "helicopter parent," always hovering overhead to make sure your child does things right - and swooping in at the first sign of trouble? Big mistake. Kids need to experience disappointment. They need to know what it's like to struggle with a problem. If it's a matter of protecting your child's safety or health, by all means…
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Good relationship with dad can help fight stress

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Parenting
Do you remember playing games with your dad or having heart-to-heart talks? For men, many years later, that turns out to be incredibly important. The relationship you had with your father, and the way that you treat your sons, may be more influential than you think. Here are more details from WebMD: A new study presented at the annual convention of the American Psychological Association reveals that men who had positive relationships with their fathers are better equipped to deal with the stress of everyday life than men who did not remember their dads fondly. "A big take-home message is that if there is a father present in a child’s life, he needs to know how important it is to be involved," said Melanie Mallers of California State University, Fullerton.…
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A Toolkit For Banishing Bullies

Children's Health, Mental Health, Parenting
For years I’ve been a medical consultant for HealthTeacher.com. Recently they published a very helpful article on “Banishing Bullies.” I hope that readers who are parents, teachers, coaches, pastors, and others who love and care for children will find this information helpful. This time last year, 15-year-old Phoebe Prince was getting ready to start high school in South Hadley, Mass. Today, as her classmates prepare for their sophomore year, her family and friends mourn their loss. One January afternoon, after enduring three months of relentless torment at school and online, Phoebe came home from school and committed suicide. The circumstances were horrible, but the truth is Phoebe's story has helped shine the spotlight on this serious issue. The Health Resources and Services Administration estimates that up to 25 percent of…
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Rules for Preventing Bullying

Children's Health, Mental Health, Parenting
For years I’ve been a medical consultant for HealthTeacher.com. Recently they published a very helpful article on “Banishing Bullies.” I thought that this section of the article, on "Rules for Preventing Bullying" was particularly helpful. I hope that readers who are parents, teachers, coaches, pastors, and others who love and care for children will find this information helpful. Jonathan Cohen, president of the Center for Social and Emotional Education, says more than 160,000 American students stay home from school on any given day because they’re afraid of being bullied. Understand what bullying is, and isn't: Despite the prevalence of bullying, Cohen says there’s actually a lot of confusion as to what is and what is not bullying. “Most bullying prevention experts focus on two key critical factors: power and intent,”…
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Young teens underestimate bullying … wonder “Is it just me?”

Children's Health, Mental Health, Parenting
How to help your child cope with a bully New research is suggesting that adolescents underestimate the degree to which their peers are bullied. The online study of 1,454 adolescents ages 12-17, conducted by researchers at the University of California, Los Angeles, tried to gauge the differences between school bullying and cyberbullying and found that young people underestimate the bullying of their peers, particularly when it takes place online. At least one incident of school bullying was reported by 77% of adolescents; 72% reported having been cyberbullied. But when young people were asked how much their peers may have had similar experiences in school and online, just 61% thought peers were bullied in school and 50% said peers had these experiences online. "Even though we think of the online context of…
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New Lesbian Parenting Study Makes Claims Unsupported by the Evidence

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Parenting
You probably heard or read a headline saying something like this, "The National Longitudinal Lesbian Family Study (NLLFS) published byAmerican Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) offers the following conclusion: 'Adolescents who have been reared in lesbian-mother families since birth demonstrate healthy psychological adjustment.'" Now, Dr. A. Dean Byrd, PhD, MBA,MPH, has evaluated the data and comes up with a completely different conclusion. Here are the details from Life Site News: Authors Gartrell and Bos generalize their findings to the lesbian population at large, claiming their research offers "implications for same-sex parenting." Making an enormous scientific leap, they conclude that their study provides scientific proof that there is "no justification for restricting access to reproductive technologies or child custody on the basis of the sexual orientation of the parents." Implied, though not…
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Listening to Mozart Won’t Make Your Child Smarter

Children's Health, Parenting
First we learned that DVDs intended for babies are not only not helpful to children, but may harm them. Now comes a study showing no evidence of the so-called 'Mozart Effect.' The study, reviewing over 40 studies done of the topic, was performed by Austrian researchers. HealthDay News has a report with the details: For years, research showing a link between listening to Mozart and increased brainpower spurred parents to expose their tots to the great composer. But now, a new Austrian review finds there's no evidence that listening to Mozart -- however glorious the music -- will do anything for anyone's cognitive powers. In particular, the findings debunked the myth of improved spatial task performance among Mozart listeners. University of Vienna psychologists examined more than 40 studies and unpublished…
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Mothers with kids at home needed to fill out brief survey by Father’s Day

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Parenting
The headlines at MSNBC are no different that those carried by most news media this last month: “Children of lesbian parents do well.” These headlines are based on a study published in the journal Pediatrics. You can see a critique of the study here and a negative commentary on the study here. But, you may be wondering, “What can I do to counter the latest attack of political correctness?” How can I  respond to the recent Lesbians-Make-the-Best-Parents claims? The Ruth Institute has a great idea -- a way YOU can fight back against the absurd bias of academia and the media. First, let me the Ruth Institute make a long story short: The study that made the headlines in Fox News and MSNBC is small sample of politically interested, statistically…
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Lesbians are the “Best Parents Ever”? Eight reasons why the latest study doesn’t prove anything!

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Parenting
You’ve all seen the headlines by now: “Children of lesbian parents do well.” These headlines are based on a study published in the journal Pediatrics. Here’s a excellent critique of the study by Jennifer Roback Morse of the Ruth Institute,  a project of the National Organization for Marriage: I actually read the study, which is my custom before commenting. I also read the letters to the editor on this study. Here are 8 reasons why this study does not prove anything about the functioning of the children of lesbians. The sample is extremely small: 78 children of lesbian mothers and 93 children in the control group. The sample of lesbian mothers is unlikely to be representative of the general population of lesbians. This is a sample of people who volunteered for the…
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Three Really Pernicious Messages behind the “Lesbians Make Better Parents” Story line

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Parenting
Conservative researchers and bloggers are dealing with the sampling and reporting problems associated with a recent study purporting to show that the children of lesbians are doing just fine. Here’s a commentary on the study by Jennifer Roback Morse of the Ruth Institute, a project of the National Organization for Marriage: The fact is, that the study claims that the children of lesbians are doing better in every dimension than the children in the general population. The underlying message of this story is NOT simply, “leave us alone to have kids the way we want.” Herewith, are the Three Really Pernicious Messages behind the “Lesbians Make Better Parents” Story line: Women are better parents than men. Therefore, two women are better for kids than a mother and a father. Men are unnecessary and…
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Surprisingly, Family Time Has Grown

Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Mental Health, Parenting
Working parents perpetually agonize that they don’t see enough of their children. But a surprising new study finds that mothers and fathers alike are doing a better job than they think, spending far more time with their families than did parents of earlier generations. In my book, God's Design for the Highly Healthy Teen, I write, "Other than blameless (unconditional) love, there is no more powerful connector than the gift of TIME." In other words, in connecting with your child, you must spend time with them. I often tell parents, there is no "quality" time without "quantity time." And, there is no better investment, after our relationship with our creator and our spouse (if we're married) than to spend time with out children. Here are the details of this new study…
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Study: Abortion Has More Negative Parenting Impact Than Other Pregnancy Loss

Bioethics, Children's Health, Marriage and Family Health, Mental Health, Parenting, Woman's Health
Amy Sobie is the editor of The Post-Abortion Review, a quarterly publication of the Elliot Institute. The organization is a widely respected leader in research and analysis of medical, mental health, and other complications resulting from abortions. This very informative article of hers was carried in Life News. More Information: (more…)
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Parents can help kids to slim down

Children's Health, Nutritional Health, Obesity, Parenting
A weight loss intervention directed at parents of overweight children may be as effective as interventions directed at both parents and children, study findings suggest. This new study confirms what Dr. Walt and his colleagues found when they did research for their book SuperSized Kids: How to protect your child from the obesity threat. You can find the book here.  More Information: (more…)
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